.:: Yolospat ::.

As much as I try
As much as I fail
The bad decisions
The short list of good ones

The pain overwhelms
Life takes a turn
Not for the better
Just the opposite

And I’m still here
Chugging away
Like nothing is wrong
When everything is

I’m so tired
I’m so sick
My plate can’t hold
Everything it should

I will never forget
When everything changed
My sentence, my cross to bare
Is mine only, forever

~yolospat

So, I was digging through some old files I had taken from the hard drive of my previous desktop. I found a poem I had completely forgotten about, written the very moment I feel in love with Brendan. I don’t even know if I shared this with him or not.

I listen to your music to feel closer to you
I wear your shirts, to wrap you around me
I smell your deodorant, to re-live your scent
I close my eyes, and feel you kiss my neck
Time murders me, with red tears
My void is only filled by your being
To be so far away, I hold my hand against my heart
Life beats through you, because of you
Patience stands at my doorstep, knocking
As a friend, embraces, and offer tea
Like a piano that can’t play without it’s strings
My breath is taken into your lungs
Our magic is exhaled transforming infinity..

Of course, I ended up marrying the guy…One of the best decisions I’ve ever made.