The best way I can describe the Windsor Spine Center is taken from the commercial on TV when the man talks about the Cancer Centers of America and how they breath hope into you. That’s exactly what the clinic is doing for me. The people that work there are genuine and they truly care about their clients. My normal routine when I get there is to do my stretches, then Dr. Rich or Dr. Jason make adjustments to my neck and spine. Next I do different stretches focusing on the neck and legs which one of the girls assists with. After that I go and sit in traction for 10 minutes (might sound mid-evil but it really feels good). Last stop is laser treatment that I get done all the way up and down my spine which promotes pain relief and helps bring down the inflammation in my spine that is damaging my nerves. Every Monday I have a weigh in with my nutrition specialist and we go over my meal plan for the week. I also attend classes every Tuesday that goes along with the Ideal Protein diet with others that are on the diet (which most everyone is that goes there is on).

I’ve gotten to know some of the other patients that have the same schedule as me and I’ve made a lot of new friends. I look forward to seeing them every time I go. One patient is my age and he and I have become buddies. He was shy at first but he’s opened up the more we talk. When I got done with my stretches today I went and laid down on the adjustment table to wait for Dr. Rich to adjust my back and neck. He looked over and said “you are so pretty” which caught me off guard, but not as much as it caught him off guard. He said “did I just say that outloud?” and his face turned as red as my hair. I thought it was cute. When he was on his way out he said “see ya next week cutie” .. It made me smile. It’s been a while since I’ve gotten a compliment like that from a guy. Sort of made my day.

It was a big day for me in another way too. My Uncle Don has been needing a wheelchair since his surgery and now that I don’t need it anymore I packed it up and dropped it off at his and my Aunt Donna’s house. I know he meant this as a compliment but he said he hasn’t seen me look this healthy and strong since before I left for Florida in 2005 because since then I’ve looked like an invalid. Nice, eh? Made me laugh in the car on the way home.

I cut my hair and bleached it and it looks totally rockin’

Like a 1980's Punk Rock Chick

The one person I have control over is me. I’ve learned some pretty hard lessons this last year I’m surprised I made it out with my sanity. I’m going to let go of the last horrible rotten year and leave it in the past. I will carry with me those lessons learned. They are the only stow aways that are permitted to come with me into 2011.

I will do everything in my power to kick myself. I’m going to kick my ass out of the pity parties that have been coming around more and more it seems. I’m going to get myself out from underneath this cloud of negativity. I’m not going to be afraid to fail – because i will from time to time and I can grow from it – at least I would have tried.

My first leap into making this the year of Yolospat has to do with my better half. My best friend and soulmate. My ex-husband. I know I know, you’re all thinking, “You’re best friends with your ex-husband?!” Well, we are a rare breed I suppose. In fact, we have better communication skills now with each other than when we were married. I would have not made it through this last year without him. It’s been a year and almost 4 months since I saw him last so this month I’m going to fly out to Georgia to see him. We are both excited, and it gives us something to look forward to. We never got to say goodbye when we made – in my opinion – too rash of a decision. Growth and good changes between us have happened, and also individually that couldn’t have happened had we still been together. Brendan is what smiles are made of, and I can’t wait to see him. We have agreed that I would bring his xmas box with me instead of shipping it so that we can open his presents together.

I have a few projects lined up for this next year. I will be focusing on my writing this year. This includes my blogs, articles, journaling, poetry, freelancing, short stories and a novel I’m working on at the moment. I’m also going to be focusing on my artwork and bring my portfolio into existence. I’m going to try and volunteer at the humane society. I also have house projects lined up, like painting a few rooms, my fence and my deck. I need to put the art studio back together too. I think I might bring the studio inside and put it int he basement for the winter so I won’t have to worry about heating the garage (which is detached from the home).

I have to remember to pace myself. Living with Fibromyalgia is a very tricky balancing act. If I have a good day and I use up more energy than I should have I’ll be in bed for the next 2 days exhausted. I have to remember that I can only do so much and the better I pace myself the greater my “good days” will be. I also want to talk about Fibromyalgia this year in detail to spread the word and to debunk the myths. I’ve talked about it briefly from time to time but it’s a very hard medical condition to understand. I want to help people understand, so anyone has questions please feel free to ask.

My Writer’s Market book came in the mail yesterday. It’s what every writer needs in reference to publishing, agents, writing idea’s, tips and tricks. You name it, it’s got it. It also has the updated 2011 list of all agents and houses, including what they specialize in and what they are looking for. I also got the Short Story Writer’s Market book too.

I hope everyone makes this year a better year. I know I am.

It ran out of space.

I headed straight to ATTs website and for the first time, I took advantage of my upgrade features. I got the iPhone3gs 32GB (white of course). It arrived in the mail yesterday, sparkly and brand new. Right away I powered it to full and sync’d my whole music library. To my gleeful surprise I still had room! This is not something I’ve ever ran into before. So I started syncing some of my TV shows I haven’t watched yet. I’m a big fan of Fringe & The Office. After that sync got done I was again surprised to see I still had tons of room.

It’s not like my music collection is tiny by any means but over the years I’ve weeded out the music I don’t listen to anymore. I decided not to push my luck and happily left all that empty space, proud that my usual instinct to fill a drive to the fullest was at peace.

Next I started loading my iPhone apps. One of my favorite apps right now is “Red Laser.” It reads bar codes and suggests places you can get that product the cheapest or it will tell you the nutritional value of a food product like it did for a loaf of wheat bread Mom got from Safeway.

With the iPhone3gs the camera on it is so clear and it has the focus capability. All those barcodes my iPhone3g wouldn’t read the iPhone3gs picks up in seconds. I think I’ve managed to scan every barcode I could find upstairs in Mom’s house.

The good news is my Uncle Don is going to buy my old iPhone3g since my Aunt Donna just got one under one condition. I have to give them a rash course on the basics as well as the fun stuff like apps, picture messaging, and text messaging. I’m looking forward to that. I get so excited about gadgets I want to tell everyone about them.

One more thing the iPhone3gs has is something I’ve been wanting since 2005 when I left Colorado for Florida. A compass. Ironic I have one now when I have no idea which direction is up and/or down and what my future will bring. I think it’s perfect timing I got it now.

Good Timing ….

Brendan wasn’t able to make the trip and he missed out on his second half of his birthday present that was waiting here in Colorado. It makes me sad, but it’s beyond my control.

It’s just so great being back in Colorado. Molly and I slept like a log last night. Didn’t wake up once. I’m just getting ready to take an afternoon nap from all the running around. It wore me out and my back is still hurting from yesterday when I was trying to hurry te backs we packed so packing could be easier.

I think that I’m going to start that nap right about now.

Brendan and I will be going to Colorado in September for my Grandmother Reba’s 90th birthday party. This will be the first time meeting the family. I’m sure he’s nervous and shy and scared. The same emotions I have since I haven’t seen that part of the family since I was a child. We will be good support for each other. I’ll get to introduce him to my Colorado friends too which is going to be the highlight of the trip. The first thing I thought of when we got the airplane tickets was, PACK THE WIRELESS ROUTER as my Mother only has one computer. Funny what geeks think of before the necessities. What am I talking about, that IS a necessity!

Molly is growing fast. She’s now the size of a 10 week old kitten. She’s also getting a little attitude but I’m sure that’s because I spoil her. She does know what “no” means and she stops once she hears it. Smart little booger that she is. We’ll be boarding them at the PetSmart Hotel in the same kennel. They don’t like being away from each other and Molly will need Jonah on her first time away from Mommy and Daddy. Hey, when you don’t have kids, your pets are kids.

Ever since I’ve been laid off our “baby” plans have taken a back burner. Makes me made especially when I see all my friends and couples my same age who either have babies or are planning for babies. We decided to try for kids our second year of marriage and we’re getting close to our 3rd year anniversary. I’m scared one day I’ll say, to hell with it. I hope that day never comes, but it makes two people who thinks it’s time not just one in most cases.

I can’t wait until all the trees start changing so I can go around taking pictures of Kennesaw in the fall. It’s so beautiful. I’m looking so forward to seeing Colorado again. Every time I’m there I miss it more and more. In some ways I feel Kennesaw has been ruined for me with the job and all. See, here I go taking about it when I said I would stop but so much anger is still present about it. People who I thought were friends were actually against me and people who I’ve busted my ass for .. well, I’m going to let it go for now. Only person I hear from is my friend Brian. He’s always been the one I knew would call me and remain friends with me. We have too much of a history and we’ve both gone through so much hell with that company that we’re the only ones that totally understand each other with sparked a wonderful friendship. We also depend on each other to cat sit or dog sit when either one of us is gone. He’s in the Dominican Republic right now for a work thing and we are currently taking care of his cat “Little” who loves the continued chaos that Brendan and I are used to with the pets (kids). She soaks it up like a sponge and goes home as happy as she can be. We’re her second home and she’s Brendan’s favorite since she favors Brendan rather than myself. The other three kids (pets) favor me over him so it works out good to balance things out.

Last week my best friend and adopted sister, Cam, stopped by here with her husband on their way to Texas where her husband who is in the Army got stationed. It’s been 2 years since I’ve seen her and it was the most wonderful visit for the short time they could stay. I’ve realized that 2 years is too long in-between visits and not to make that mistake again. What a refreshing day and 2 nights it was to have them stay. Next time I’m going to have to visit them in Texas and make it down near Houston to visit my long time friend Tiffany and see my neices. They have been going through a hard time since Tiffany’s recent divorice and since I’m going to miss Sharon’s birthday this year I need to make it up to her. Kids just grow up too fast, too fast indeed.

I’ll never forget her keyring which taught me my first curse word. It was a big red plastic one that said “BITCH” engraved on it. Whenever I would ask her what it meant she just said it was a female dog. She never had dogs so I could never figure it out, at least until I was older.

She was one of those woman who told odd stories. Once she took me up to Estas Park in the Rocky Mountains. Every high cliff we went by she would tell me that that’s where the Indians used to jump off to commit suicide. In my young mind I knew that wasn’t true, but whenever I see cliffs my eyes still visualize Native Americans jumping off those cliffs. I always wondered who cleaned up the bones afterwords.

Anyway, as eccentric as you were Gram B (which is actually on her license plate on her car she hasn’t driven in 12 years), I loved you. I hope you come back as a dog so you can learn how to laugh and love.

I was so mad that I just threw my kindle 2 in the garbage since nothing showed up on the screen. For reading purposes, that’s a pretty important thing.

I started hearing about this $5M class action lawsuit against Amazon for the very same problem as what happened with both of my kindles. My first thought was .. shit … I threw that damn kindle away. I decided to call Amazon again to see what they could do. At first I was told there was nothing they could do if I didn’t have the device to send back. I told this man on the phone, look how many Kindles I’ve purchased and other things. I’m a very loyal customer to Amazon and well, I used to spend a lot of money there (now that I’m laid off, no more spending on fun loving gadgets). Anyway, he Amazin guy on the phone asked me to hold on a sec and he would talk to his supervisor. It wasn’t but a few minutes that he was back on the phone telling me that they would be sending me out a brand new Kindle 2 at no charge and without returning the other one since it’s in some land dump somewhere.

I was so excited I was thinking him over and over and embarrassing him because you can only say your welcome so much. It should be here first thing tomorrow morning. Finally, I’ll have a kindle again.

Here that Sissy, I’m getting my Kindle back! I can read again

There is a possibility that Brendan will be getting full time here soon which is great news. This will mean health insurance. I’m not sure if he has to wait 60 or 90 days like most companies. In the meantime I’ll have COBRA insurance at least. Mom will be helping me turn my 401k into a CD which will draw interest. More on that later.

Here is our little one in her bed chewing on a bone and getting sleepy. I wish I could get sleepy right about now.